Blind Optimism

I hate too much optimism, it disgusts me. There I said it.

How much is too much? Well, they say it right that too much of anything is bad, even optimism. Blind optimism, if that’s a thing, is what I’m talking about. Being unrealistically optimistic – that’s what I mean.

Why do I hate it? Because it clouds your judgment. It makes you look at life through rose-colored glasses. It makes us happy, momentarily, and odds are that we overlook some important details what what needs to be achieved. It’s kinda counterproductive in a sense that it gives you a laid back, cheerful outlook.

You know when people say, “Everything will get better”, I want to virtually slap them because that’s a false statement. Some things may get better, some things might not. Okay now that sounds infinitely rational and better. People tell us to have a positive outlook, how about realistic and balanced?

Why or how can I be positive when I am dying from inside?

I could go on and on about this considering how enthusiastic I am about depressive realism, but let’s save that for when I have nothing to write about. Do let me know what you guys think.

 

 

Advertisements

Shift of Perspective

Oh hi there, look who’s here (that rhymed!)

Here I am this is me, there’s no where else on Earth I’d rather be (points for correctly guessing the reference)

Umm well actually not really, I would definitely rather be somewhere else, but I’m satisfied with my current state as well. So yeah, updates are such that I moved rooms, pretty much settled by now, but the shift of room aka perspective was much needed, long over due and just what I needed. Don’t ask me why or how it happened – that’s a long boring story. But cheers for me that I got it across this time, with success, of course. *cheers*

The room is a bit away from the living room, so its with less noise, interruptions and whatnot. I absolutely love the silence. I hope it brings with it the clarity I could definitely use. I’m been engrossed with the room decor, kinda sorta halfway thru it. It’s a nice break from thesis writing and I don’t mind that sort of a distraction. Plus playing with colors has always been my thing.

Feels good to blog after a while. As always, I’m making a mental note of writing often. Writing is therapeutic, like cooking. Both are creative too. Speaking of which I made this apple sauce thingy as a food experiment that I am so fond of doing. It turned out nice. Juicy and lemony (I added lemon juice).

So I get off, only to write another post. Stay tuned!

P.S. I don’t own the image.

On Happiness

Happiness, by definition is “A state of mind in which our thinking is pleasant, a good share of the time.”

It  seems to work wonders, like a great medicine. When we are thinking pleasant thoughts, we think, perform and feel better. Research has proven that our memory is highly improved when we are thinking pleasant thoughts. An old Dutch proverb “Happy people are never wicked” concludes that happiness and criminality cannot co-exist. It shows that the hostility towards others is brought about by our own unhappiness. Though we usually put the cart before the horse but this will never be near truth if we say “Be happy and you will be good, more successful, healthier”.  We must understand happiness is not to be earned or deserved. Therefore, if we wait until we ‘deserve’ to think pleasant thoughts and be happy, we are likely to think unpleasant thoughts concerning our own unworthiness. We do not live, nor enjoy life in the present moment, but we wait for some magical future event or occurrence to make us feel happy.

In truth, happiness is a choice, it’s a habit.  If you continue to regularly feed your subconscious mind with happy thoughts, it would become habitual. We indeed have the freedom to choose happiness since it is a state of mind. It’s simple, but most of us do not see the simplicity of the key to happiness. When we choose to be happy, it brings a sense of well-being in all areas of our life – whereas, we unconsciously choose unhappiness. We need to become aware of our inner dialogue. Catch ourselves being overly critical and negative towards our self.

We often try to buy happiness by purchasing things – a high definition TV, the latest car, expensive designer clothes, a fine house, but happiness cannot be bought in that way. Wealth in itself will not make you happy. A promotion or honour will not yield happiness. The truth is that happiness is a mental state, irrespective of what you have or don’t have. Your happiness lies in bridging the gap between your subconscious and conscious mind by tapping into the hidden power of the subconscious.

Reference:

The Power of Your Subconscious Mind – Dr Joseph Murphy

 

I came across this article written in 2008  😀

 

 

 

Self-Created Misery

Hi. I’m back with some whining (no surprise).

Speaking of which, I think whining keeps us sane. Yes?

So yeah, I’m having a lot of fun in my self-created misery bubble. Not only its perpetually grumpy but also with a dash of gloomy and irritability. Sounds nice, doesn’t it?

I swear I have no idea what’s causing this misery to stick to me like some clingy girlfriend or superglue (whichever’s worse). I’m finding hard to take interest in anything.  Like anything at all. Please feel free to diagnose me.

To keep myself from dying of boredom, I might as well end up here. But guess what, I don’t feel like writing much either! -_-

Okay bye. Laptop battery dying, just like my motivation to write anything more.

 

 

 

Back Again!

Beach sunrise with lighthouse

Beach sunset with lighthouse

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Okay looks like I am overexcited to be back, which I kind of am. It wouldn’t be fair to say I haven’t written anything decent in a while, because *pause for effect* I maintain a formal bloggy thing now called Brain Knittngs! Check it out at http://www.brainknittings.com and connect on the social media accounts (shameless self promotion) Okay whatever!

It feels incredibly good to be back in my own cosy space. Although I have nothing on my mind as such, to talk about but still. I just thought to check on this blog and see if its still breathing.

Soooo yes. That is about it. I will try (not promising) to write here more often now that University is off and I have more time, or do I? So when I am not cooking a mess in the kitchen or fighting with my mom, I will come here and scribble my thoughts, and you can see if that makes any sense to you? Not that it has to.

Cheers!

P.S. The image has nothing to do with my current life status, but I have a thing for lighthouses. And the picture is soothing. Kbye.

Queen Cinderella

Well, hello there! Look who’s back – the Queen herself! *please bear with my grandiosity or there’s the exit door*

You know winter is in the air when you are happy without a reason. Though one should be happy without a reason, that way happiness is not dependent on any thing, event or person (worst case). Right, so that is lesson # 1. Never depend on something or someone. Believe me when I say depending on a person for your happiness is the worst thing cuz people are not here to stay. They leave, abandon, die, move on, become estranged. I could go on and on about dependency and attachments. And as much as I hate being attached to people, it happens faster than lightning. Maybe we can save another post for that.

Queen Cinderella MMVII

Anyhow I think I am having an existential crisis. Finally my quarter-life crisis (please look it up) is over but I guess crises have developed an attachment (oops) with me. Speaking of the newest crisis, I can’t seem to decide whether I am the Queen or Cinderella. Polar opposites I get it, who knows it might be a new type of bipolar disorder. *this is what being a psych major does to you* Where was I? Yes, so I am torn between these two. People ask me if I enjoy the youngest child I privileges of being pampered, and I say to myself its more like Cinderella. Forever unappreciated.

Without further elaborating (read:whining) on that, I shall end this post. Cuz I have kinda sorta promised myself to catch myself short of any negative thoughts! So, true to my promise, keep away the whining. Good day!

Beyond Pink and Blue

We’ve all noticed a pretty common phenomenon of shoving kids into rigid gender stereotypes. Things like girls play with dolls and boys play with cars are examples of outdated gender roles where global gender role definitions are changing. In this ever changing world, we desperately need to shed our age-old beliefs about typical roles and the like, which have brought more bad than good to children’s naive minds. In order to get out of the pink-or-blue box, parents (or anyone dealing with kids) needs to view both genders as equally capable humans. Confining of gender preferences leads to limiting the child’s natural abilities.BKwomen-149577_640 “Girls cannot do math, boys shouldn’t cry” are just pathetic statements coming out of an ignorant mind. We were told, and we believed it, without questioning. a-woman-needs-a-man-like-a-fish-needs-a-bicycle-21A girl with an analytical mind may never get to polish it because she was denied to play with mechanical toys. A boy with a nurturance need may never develop it further because playing with dolls is too “girly”. Speaking of which, our own perceptions of gender roles essentially come from howgender-roles we were raised, but let’s not complain over how we were parented. Let’s break the cycle, let’s look ahead and play our part in breaking the obnoxious, self-limiting, damaging gender labeling. Let’s raise children with wisdom instead of stereotypes.

When Life Gives You Lemons Demand to See Life’s Manager

“No! I didn’t ask for these! I do not want them! Take ’em back, take back your darn lemons!”

Life has its own way of doing things.You ask Allah for ease, He hands you difficulties, you ask Him for clarity, He doubles your confusion. “What is this?”, you ask, exasperated. “This is not what I asked for.” But then a voice from within admonishes you, “Hush, don’t complain!” And life goes on.

You wonder if you really should make lemonade from the lemons life throws at you, but then you remember that you need sugar and water for that. Ah, life is full of disappointments!

Somewhere between waking and dreaming, you figure out that these sour, bitter lemons are actually good for healing your soul… Oh really, who could’ve thought. Maybe the trials, tests, struggles, confusions, inner battles we face everyday are there to polish us. What if these rocky paths are to make you stronger and preparing you for something great… But what if these wobbly paths are preparing you for the hanging bridge? Because in the end; life has a mind of its own.

Good luck handling life, and if life does throw lemons at you, grin and throw ’em back at life!

Opposite of Love

Hi there, long time!

My apologies for not writing anything since months. I was hooked, honestly. Do you know what is the opposite of everyone’s favorite word: love?

Counter-intuitive as it may sound, the opposite of love is not hate/hatred; it is indifference. Hatred itself is an emotion, rather a very negative one. It can destroy your peace of mind and can be a huge burden on your soul, so to speak. But then again, what is it about indifference that makes it stand against love?

I think it is the mere lack of interest and attention that makes it so harsh-sounding. But we must remember that while attachments are the root cause of most of human suffering, detachment AKA indifference must be a useful tool to prevent some of the suffering. Do give it a thought! Catch you soon.

Woes of an Eastern Daughter

Sahi he tou rote hain log jab beti peda hoti hai. It really is a curse to be a girl, in an Eastern society. Let alone society, the role of family comes first. Especially mother’s undue preference towards sons. As if this discrimination is not unfair enough, married daughters are glorified, as if they have bathed in gold water. Lovingly referred to as “mehman” little do they remember that all daughters are mehman; regardless, and should be treated with love and care.
To be a daughter is to be helpless. You have to watch over your words and actions so as not to hurt your parents. There might be times when you have to suppress the urge to complain just to avoid causing them problems. Because brothers are always around to demand good treatment as if it is their birth right and their wives take full advantage of it knowing that their complaints will be given preference. Parents, in their innocence try to avoid upsetting their beloved “bahus” so as not to anger their princes AKA sons. Of course, daughters-in-law are far more dear to them than blood daughters. Despite knowing that one day she will leave the house they miss no opportunity to make her feel inferior. Maybe parents of daughters need to be reminded of a hadith “If one has got three daughters and looks after them well, shows them mercy and disciplines them, Paradise becomes wajib for him/her.”

As an escape from the domestic tension, she may want to seek a career or go abroad for further studies, but she cannot, because her every decision is in her parent’s hands and the certainly do not want to waste their money on something that does not belong to them.

If a daughter is doing nothing, she is taunted for being lazy and insensitive and how she will make a terrible bahu but if a son is doing nothing he is taking rest and the daughter should cook him dinner. In a society where women are joining the male dominant territory, what kind of primitive age are we living in where the gender bias is increasing rather than decreasing?

I think parents of today have forgotten that a son is a son until he gets a wife but daughter is a daughter all her life.